Like a dog that emerges from the ocean or a lake; and hesitates at the water’s edge and shakes the water from it’s coat… so I shake off the recent disturbances negatively affecting my ’emotional body’.
Some fundamental characteristics of Living creatures are: adaptability, flexibility, and of course, motility.
A very important person in my life recently pointed out that I do not ‘shun’ nor ‘ignore’ the painful emotions I experience, but rather, I do acknowledge these painful experiences as fully as I know how. I accept this kind of pain as a Natural consequence of being Human and Alive.
Some people get bogged down into the negativity that is a consequence of emotionally painful experiences. It does take a degree of self-discipline to focus on other positive aspects of one’s Life when one is sometimes knocked off balance by a powerful wave of negativity.
Perhaps all Humans have the ability to be ‘sensitive’ or ’empathetic’ to the pain of others. Perhaps it may be so that, like any other attribute, the degree to which a Human is sensitive or has the ability to empathize with another varies from individual to individual. Certainly all Humans have traits and abilities that are unique. Some are ‘naturally athletic’ others are not. Some are ‘more intelligent’ than others. So, certainly, it may be so that some are Naturally more sensitive or empathetic.
It is also true that no matter what a person’s ‘Natural ability’ may be, anyone can improve any ability through the discipline of ‘practice’.
My young life provided me with much opportunity to ‘practice’ both feeling empathy, and with noticing how my sensitivity to another person’s pain caused me emotional pain. So, I have much ‘practice’ in these matters.
What I have learned is, that I am unable to control another person’s behavior. I have had to learn to separate my empathy for someone from my own actual circumstance. I have had to learn that while it is ‘Human’ to empathize, it can be debilitating for me if I don’t pay attention.
If I truly can do nothing to alleviate the painful circumstance or negative thought life or negative emotional swirl of another person… and I continue to feel like it is my responsibility (as a compassionate Human) to ‘help’ my loved one, friend, or other in distress… it may cause ME great harm.
It is very much like trying to change the course of a raging river armed with a shovel. It is an exercise in futility. It is important to become very clear about the extent of one’s actual abilities. And it is equally important to face the fact that there may be times when a loved one, friend or stranger in distress is not willing to receive help (even if it were possible).
To show respect to another one must listen carefully to what they want or desire. It is important to respect that each of us has the ‘right’ to govern and direct our own way in Life. We own ourselves. Each person (even if you think they are ‘wrong’) has the innate ‘right’ to manage their own choices. That is as true for me as it is for any other.
What is there for me to do then? To create and Live a happy Life begins with building and maintaining a properly proportioned Love and respect of ‘self’.
To allow myself to be debilitated by emotionally or mentally dwelling in the negativity or the emotional pain and suffering of any ‘other’ is to disrespect my own ‘self’. I must, as the title of this entry states, ‘Move Forward’ with my Life.
Kindly excuse me for now… There is a waterfall not too far from here waiting to be discovered.